Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem
LETTER
FIFTEEN
Mujaahadah and Taubah
Question
As-Salaamu alaykum wa-Rahmatullahi
wa-Barakaatuhu
Respected Maulana, despite having
spent 5 years at Madrasah, and being occupied in the Khidmat of Deen, I still
find myself weak with regard to nafs and shaytaan. I still fall into some sin
or the other. This makes me very despondent and a feeling of darkness envelops
me. I carry out some good a’maal and then spoil them with some bad deed. There are
times when I find myself intending to do something displeasing to Allah Ta’ala,
then though I find restlessness in my heart, I give in to nafs and shaytaan.
After this, I cry in repentance, but after some time, fall into some sin again.
I try to read Tahajjud but would
like to become regular in its performance. I have been told that it is not good
to sleep during the time of Fajr and would like to verify.
Reply
Bismihi
Ta’ala
Sister in Islam,
Wa-alaykumus Salaam wa-Rahmatullahi wa-Barakaatuhu
1.) The Hadeeth states that all of
the children of Hazrat Aadam (Alaihis Salaam) are sinners but the best of them
are those who make Taubah.
“To
err is human” –
but every experience, good or bad, should be a means by which we draw lessons.
...As we go through the mill of
life, we draw from our experiences and learn the dark and dangerous zones of
life, the red light areas and the green light areas of life. But it becomes
easier to escape the dark alleys of sins, when we follow someone who has a lamp
or torch. Sometimes we think that the short cut is better, but the longer route
is spiritually safer. However, it is only a spiritual guide who can lead us
down the right path… otherwise, nafs and shaytaan make us branch off at some
stage, taking us far from Allah Ta’ala’s pleasure - despite our knowledge of Deen. (Allah Ta’ala protect us
all).
2.) The Fatwa[1]
given by your heart, by means of the restlessness, was that this deed is wrong.
3.) Regret, remorse and tears of
repentance are dearly loved by Allah Ta’ala. It even honours a person with
higher spiritual stages, conditional to the person being sincere. So be
hopeful. Allah Ta’ala is Loving, Merciful and Forgiving. Alhamdulillah, He has
given you the Taufeeq of Taubah, but this should not make you complacent.
4.) Retrace your steps to obedience.
Give up sins and continue with the Fardh and Waajib and Sunnah. Allah Ta’ala
will grant the Taufeeq to do even more when you prove yourself in the efforts
that you will now make to obey Him.
5.) Listen to my weekly talks (which
are audio-streamed). Read the kitaabs again, especially “Combating the whisperings of shaytaan” and “Aashiq-e-Sawdiq”. Insha-Allah, there will be benefit and
improvement.
6.) You can wake up half an hour
before Fajr for Tahajjud and stay awake right until Ishraaq. The morning is
blessed for the Ummah of Nabi (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam). Work towards
having a rest in the afternoons. But if you cannot do so, then sleep when sleep
comes, but not at the cost of a Fardh Salaah. It is not a sin to sleep after
Fajr Salaah, as some make it out to be.
7.) If you find it difficult to wake
up for Tahajjud, read 2 Rakaats (or more) before the Witr and you will get the
reward, Insha-Allah. You will also get more reward in abstaining from sin, than
reading Tahajjud – although, the merits of Tahajjud are very great. So if that
too can be secured, it is a precious bounty.
8.) Making Dua. Request the same.
Was-Salaamu alaykum wa-Rahmatullahi wa-Barakaatuhu
Yunus Patel (Maulana)
[1] Fatwa : ruling